Camera

Once I edit the footage I've shot with my NEW VIDEO CAMERA I'ma go ahead and slap a video onto this here blog. Isn't that exciting?

Poet be thou, tired be....thy?

When I get tired,
I do some crazy things.
Like glue tape onto stickers,
and draw cows with wings.

I remember in August,
after not sleeping a wink.
I put my dishes in the shower,
and washed my hair in the sink.
I then proceeded to talk,
to a mere picture of my dad.
He didn't laugh at my joke,
I walked away sad.

And now here I sit,
like vomit being returned to by a dog.
Not getting any sleep,
and updating my blog.

Phiveo

My little video of photos (phiveo) is now on youtube for easier access.

Enjoy

*beep*

And now, a man leaving someone a message but suddenly forgets who he is calling and why when he hears the beep.

*beep* "Uhhh, HEY. This is Jesse callin', umm, just needed to...ask you a question, well no, I umm...just callin' to say hey. Uhh...I heard a funny joke I thought you'd like, it's about this dude, his girlfriend wanted some Chinese food so he flew to China. It's a long joke, I'll tell you later. No need to call me back."


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Mornings.

I tell ya. Mornings. What a drag.

Monday Mornings. What a drag times two.

My alarm went off(on?) this morning at 8 o'clock. I know, I know, that's really not THAT early, but this is me I'm talking about. I need as many hours of sleep each night as a centipede has legs. More or less. Anyway, the alarm goes off at 8 and I figure instead of hitting the snooze button three more times in nine minute increments I'll just go ahead and set my alarm to 8:20. 20 minutes more of uninterrupted sleep sounded a lot better than 27 minutes of waking up every NINE to hit da shnooz.

I tell ya (again). Craziest 20 minutes ever. I fell asleep right away and started dreaming that my alarm was going off and I couldn't figure how to stop it. But I didn't think it was a dream, I thought I was awake trying to shut my alarm off. So eventually (in the dream) I stop the beeping and lay back down. I'm now worried that I'm gonna fall asleep and not wake up for a couple hours because in order to stop the beeping I had shut off the alarm fully instead of hitting snooze.

At this point in the dream I sorta wake up and realize that the alarm is still set to 8:20 and I only shut the alarm off in my dream. So I still have about 10 minutes of solid sleep ahead of me. But now I'm just getting that I'm putting all of this work and thought into trying to get a couple more minutes of sleep. I realize that I'm just being ridiculous and finally get out of bed and go about my usual school day getting to all my classes on time and everything turned out fine.

Who knew that sleep could take so much work.

Hair

Well, after many many many many many many manly months.....I finally got a haircut. In the span of about 15 minutes I went from nearly 7 inches of hair to hardly an inch. Yikes. What a change. What I'm most excited about is how it won't take 3 hours for my hair to dry anymore. That got annoying. Perhaps I'll put a picture of it up a little later.






Random Thought: An advantage to being dyslexic would be having the chance to think that Halloween will fall on Friday the 13th next year.

Learning.

So I was in Math class this morning going through a bunch of equations and I couldn't help but start to make my own equations. Equations that were WAY more interesting than the ones being taught.

Math + Morning = Boring

Math + Free Money = Less Boring

Math - Math = Awesome

Large - Small = Medium

Torso + Legs = Human

Torso × Legs = Freak

Torso ÷ Legs = Dead

Up to you

You can interpret this any way you want. There's just something about a person with a flower for a head. I don't know. It's magical.


Or stupid.

The Adventures of Lombard and Oliver.

It was a dark and stormy and night, everyone in the village of Weesoma was in a deep sleep. Everyone except Lombard the Toy Wolf and Oliver the Pumpkin. Sleep will not be on their "To Do List" tonight. If you must know, THIS is what's on their list.



You see, Oliver and Lombard are the unofficial protectors of the village, and tonight they will have their work cut out for them. For two G.I. Joe ninjas have a little "To Do List" of their own.



"These Ninjas make me sick." Said Lombard putting down the To Do List they stole. "They don't at all understand the importance of protein."

"Well I'm a little more worried about that whole 'Destroy the village' thing." said Oliver.

"Right, yeah we should probably worry about that first. What's their gameplan?"

"I have no idea. I'm just a pumpkin. You usually do everything and I seem to get half the credit for some reason."

"Oh crap."

To be continued...

Apple

Well, I was walking to class the other day and noticed some kid walking towards me with a nice green apple in his hand. I didn't really think anything of it, people walking around with apples isn't too unusual. So I kept walkin' and walkin' and once he was about 10 feet from me I saw him throw down his apple hard onto the pavement, "What the tuna??" I thought to myself, "That's gonna splatter everywhere!" But something very peculiar happened, it didn't splatter at all. In fact, it bounced perfectly back up into his hand. Was this some sort of magical apple? A distant cousin of the magical orb? I looked a little closer at what he was holding and a rush of self embarrassment came over me. He was holding a tennis ball.

Halloween

Well, Halloween is coming up before too long now. The days are getting cold and gloomy (in a good way) and people are starting to put up the good ol' fake graveyard lawn ornaments. This is all good and fun, I love this time of year, but I'm starting to get worried. I'm might go to a Halloween party this year so I'll have to wear some sort of costume AND IT NEEDS TO BE GOOD! I'm not gonna dress up like spiderman or the headless horseman or bill clinton. I need something good. Like....I'll take a bunch of shirts on hangers and put them on my arms and call myself "A walkin' closet." Get it?! HA!

Recent thoughts.

I've been thinking about some random questions lately. If anyone feels like answering go right ahead, I haven't made ANY progress with these. At all. It's really quite depressing.

Is chocolate pudding the food form of happiness?

Do some dogs comprehend a lot more than we realize?

Why is the gunk in your eye when you wake up in the mornings called "sleep"? It's so lame to call it "sleep" merely because you got it while sleeping. Why don't we start calling sweat "exercise"?

When is the next time I'm ever gonna say "by the way"? I NEVER say that.

Is it just me or do people seem to have a sixth sense that can detect when I'm staring at them?

Why are some things unnecessarily referred to as pairs? Like a pair of pants. You're only buying one. And sure, I guess it covers both your legs but a sweatshirt covers your torso and both your arms AND your head if it has a hood.

Crazy Stuff.

A nice little picture.

I'm gonna have a very busy weekend. I'm gonna be more busy than Santa Claus on Christmas Eve. So I will post a pretty picture and just wait to see when I'll be able to post again.

A nice little story.

There once were three saints. Their names were Saint Uffed, Saint Arving and Saint Upid. Saint Uffed and Saint Arving were twin brothers and Saint Upid had a hard time telling which was which sometimes. One day Saint Upid walked up to one of the twins and said, "Hello, Saint Uffed." To this the saint replied, "I'm not St. Uffed. I'm St. Arving, St. Upid."

Note.

I would like to point out the fact that I do realize I had a couple typos in the last post. And I will not correct them.

Again...

Well, it's that time of day again: Night. Which means I have never better to do than sit down and draw something.

The Battle

Hello and welcome to tonights event. There has been a lot of drama leading up to this night and I'm sure everyone is excited to see how it will turn out. The reigning champion (and fan favorite) Procrastination will be taking on long time nemesis Homework. After four long years of complete domination by Procrastination, Homework seems to finally be putting up a good fight and, in my opinion, will not give up easily in tonights battle. Lets take a look at the stats for tonights combatants.

Procrastination a.k.a. The Flaming Hawk
Total Wins: 525
Total Losses: 15
Best Win Streak: 319
Finest Moment: Not starting writing a paper until 4 in the morning after playing Medal of Honor all night and finishing paper 5 minutes before it was time to present in class.
Greatest Strength: Lotsa fun

Homework a.k.a The Fart Knocker
Greatest Strength: Properly prepares one for assignments and tests.
Greatest Weakness: Boring
Finest Moment: Nothing comes to mind

Well isn't that interesting, Procrastination shows all the markings of being lots more fun than Homework. But Homework does show signs of being "worth it in the long run". I tell ya, I can't wait to see the outcome of this, Bob.

Bob: Neither can I, Jim. Back to you.

Thanks, Bob. We'll be right back after these important messages.

Food.

Today, instead of going to the Wheaton football game I decided to stay in the apartment and eat junk food. Kit-Kats have got to be my favorite thing ever. Jack's frozen pepperoni pizzas come in at a close second. But if we're talking in ORDER that they are eaten, then it's Kit-Kats that come in second. You can't eat a candy bar and then wolf down a whole pizza. Chocolate is a dessert, not an appetizer. An ideal meal for me would start with a couple of Slim Jim Mild Beef Jerky snacks washed down with some nice smooth Minute Maid Lemonade. That really gets my appetite roaring. I then preheat the oven to 425 degrees and throw in a Jacks Pizza. While I'm waiting for the pizza to cook I might have a couple of handfulls of Cool Ranch Doritos. But the pizza only takes about 10 minutes to cook, so it's a very manageable wait. Once the pizza is cut I let it cool for a minute or two and check the fridge to see what I'll have to drink. Milk is pretty good, but I prefer Mug Root Beer. But really, anything'll do. Except water. Ugh, don't drink water with ANY meal. That's just wrong. Anyway, in order to eat the entire pizza I have to pace myself. Once it gets down to three pieces left I take a 5 minute break to let my stomach catch up with me. Some people might say that instead of taking a break I should just stop entirely and put the remaining pieces in the fridge for the next day. And to THAT I say, "For sooth!". DO I LOOK LIKE THE TYPE OF GUY THAT EATS PIZZA THAT'S BEEN IN THE FRIDGE ALL NIGHT? Pizza is to be eaten fresh! Well, I don't know how "fresh" Jacks Frozen Pizzas are, but still. You gotta draw the line somewhere. Where was I? I don't even know. All I'm really trying to say here is that Kit-Kats are good. Nothing else I've written matters. At all.

What Pressure

Imagine writing for plays and movies. Yikes. Dialogue? Yuck.

Using a Thesarus

Man oh man, I'm pretty tired right now. Well, more burned out than anything. I don't think I've ever been this haggard in my life. I just feel so petered out and pooped. I was walking down the street and I heard someone say, "Look at that boy, he looks so stale and spent." Their friend responded by saying, "I guess so, but I think he looks more weary and wasted." I turned to them and yelled, "I'm tuckered out, okay?!" Goodness, some people just don't know how to treat someone as drained as I am. If I were to use one word to sum up how I feel it would probably be exasperated. But also a little droopy. Fatigued works pretty well too. Maybe if I get a good nights sleep my brain won't feel so overtaxed. Yeah, that's what I'll do. I'll put an end to feeling drowsy and get some sleep. Sleep always makes me feel energized and fresh, but most of all it makes me feel invigorated.